Since the Divorce...

Many of my fans have been wondering what I have been up to since the divorce between the Rage, Michelita, and I. So prepare yourself for a lot of useless information about my last month.

I have moved into a house with two other girls. I live in the basement by myself (my own room and bathroom was a must). Kim, a school teacher, is pretty nice. She's younger than me and seems to have a little bit more energy than I do.
My other roommate is "Cinde". Let's just say, she's a lot older than me. She has friends that graduated in 1990. I was in fourth grade in 1990!!!
Actual conversations so far with Cinde:
1. She keeps mentioning this boyfriend that she had, I don't know when, I don't know why, she just does. Today she told me that she needed to get over it. I don't know what to say when she tells me these things. I don't care about her creepy ex-boyfriend, and I definitely don't care about the weird guy she is interested in now. Is that mean of me? Yes, probably. However, it's obvious from the few conversations that we have had that she has obviously given up on life. Remember when you were a freshman and you had that one roommate who only talked about how boys never notice her, and how she just wants to get married? That is Cinde, only she is in her mid-thirties and it's just depressing at this point.
2. Do you remember that episode of Seinfeld when he is dating a woman whose name rhymes with a part of the female anatomy? A part that rhymes with Delores? Just the other day she told me that she had no idea what that certain "part"was until Tyra Banks did a show about the female body. Tyra Banks hasn't had a talk show for that long. Is it possible that a woman in America could be that sheltered, especially after she is well into her thirties? I thought not, but my new roommate is living proof.
3. She was asking about a certain male caller I had over the other night (let's just say he lives in California now and has aspirations of being a pop star). She said she only saw the back of his head, but that he seemed to be very attractive. I just wanted to say, "Leave my best friend alone. He's not going to fall for your desperate cougar routine!"

My month has been filled with many other wonderful things, but right now my main focus is getting Cinde on "What Not To Wear". Michele said, "I laughed when that commercial came on and I realized that she was wearing the same outfit" as the woman having the fashion intervention. I'm not the best dressed kitten at the sand pit, but I at least can accept that. Cinde seems to think that she is the exception behind every fashion rule in the book. It's killing me!

Anywho, I'll try not to let so much time pass by before my next blog. I suck!